Patient: Can you hand me that urinal? I've gotta go, it's all that damn lazyticks you gave me.
Well, sure. At least you didn't ask me for it "instamediately," as did my patient last week. As in, "My baby had fever, so I didn't give her nothing but brang her here instamediately so yous all could."
Sigh. I need a vacation.
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One day I woke up and realized I'm not a baby nurse anymore. I'm not even a young nurse. I'm a real adult who has now been doing this for years, and I'm definitely expected to know what I'm doing at all times. And that's fucking terrifying.
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DISCLAIMER
HIPAA. Trust and believe, these stories are halfway made-up and halfway made up of lots of other stories. I will protect patient privacy like it's my job. Because it is.
Many of the photos showing mundane things are ones I took. As for memes and other google picture search images, I've been horribly bad at photo crediting - I will be attempting to go back through and properly credit things or remove them if I can't. But rest assured, ain't no real patient pictures up here, folks.
While I appreciate those reading the blog, I don't advertise for any website. I can only be responsible for my own opinion, and thus politely decline any offer to "host a post" or otherwise advertise something not written by me...But thanks anyway!
Many of the photos showing mundane things are ones I took. As for memes and other google picture search images, I've been horribly bad at photo crediting - I will be attempting to go back through and properly credit things or remove them if I can't. But rest assured, ain't no real patient pictures up here, folks.
While I appreciate those reading the blog, I don't advertise for any website. I can only be responsible for my own opinion, and thus politely decline any offer to "host a post" or otherwise advertise something not written by me...But thanks anyway!
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5 comments:
Perhaps they have stopped selling baby tylenol or a cool washcloth or a Brain. Jeepers Creepers Peeps. Get a clue, would ja?
Ha. It's always Lasik at my hospital. A friend of mine who used to be a medic was telling me once about all the people he used to pick up that took "fever butter balls" for their seizures. Oh, that's not it? You know, whatever.
Instamediately. I think I'll start using that...
And then there was the lady who insisted that her husband, who had CHF and was on a ventilator, was allergic to Lasix. You know, because it made him pee so much...
Our local favorite is "Dilahda". works good for pain, and makes the staff laugh!
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