Thursday, December 13, 2012

With gusto

You guys. Seriously. I was more giddy inside tonight at work than I've been in a loooong while. Usually, when the drama queens and man-babies show up in the ER with their nonexistent peripheral access sites (from lots of IV drug use) and their retch-moan-squirm routine (with VS more normal than mine) and lots of "vomicking," I have to hunt around foreeeever for an IV site. Takes me a couple of attempts and finally I get a 24G in their pinky and draw some pedi tubes of blood, which are inevitably hemolyzed.

But tonight. Oh, tonight I had an epiphany. I was standing in the room of one such patient, and internally bitching about the IV/labs/cultures x2 I had to draw off this epic man-baby. I looked at his arms, and then I happened to catch a glimpse of his big fat juicy EJ. No, I sadly thought, I'm not allowed to do EJs. Home Hospital didn't allow nurses to do them, even though my RN license says I can.

And then it hit me. I'm in TEXAS, MF'ERS! Ain't no rules against nurse initiated EJs at this hospital! I double checked with another nurse, and sho'nuff we're allowed to start them*.

I grabbed that 18G and threw the EJ in so fast it made my head spin. I had a set of cultures, full blood tubes, and a bamf IV line in like fourteen seconds. And it was so satisfying. I mean really...what is more enjoyable than telling your drama patient to hold still because you're about to shove a giant-ass needle into his neck? And the feeling of actually doing it? Glorious. Epic. Sublime.

The best part? I've never done one before but damn if I haven't watched a million ER docs place them and think "I could do that!" And apparently I can. But wait, I lied. The best part was actually when I went to the doc a while later for unrelated reasons, and he was like "man those labs were quick...where the hell did you find a line on him?" I'm all "oh, I just threw in an EJ. No biggie, son."

Boom. New skill. Acquired, suckahs.

*technically, one is required to have 3 supervised EJ starts before flying the nest. Oops. Good thing I'm a traveler and fall through those cracks!

3 comments:

Amy said...

You Go Girlfriend! Did the man-baby freak out when he realized where you were going with that harpoon?

L said...

Nah, the hope of getting IV dilaudid was enough to override his dislike of the EJ idea. Sad for him though, since he didn't get any.

Sara said...

Good for you! Add that to my list of things I'm looking forward to learning next (and last!) semester!