Tuesday, February 19, 2019

Discharge instructions

Me: Okay sir, you're all set for discharge. The doctor came in to talk with you and give you results - what did she tell you?

Patient: First of all, I can't believe you told her I did meth. I told you because you asked, but I didn't think you'd tell her.

Me: Well, you came in for anxiety and insomnia. Your tests were all normal, but the meth is FOR SURE a cause of your symptoms. It's a pretty important thing for us to know.

Patient: Yeah, but I've been doing meth for years and it's never given me any problems before! It can't be the meth. It's gotta be something else!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I have a couple of friends who say the same thing about caffiene. Insert roll eyes here.

L said...

I guess I sort of understand... you'll get my coffee from me when you can pry it from my palpitation-jittery hands.