Q: What's the difference between you and a mallard with a cold?
A: One's a sick duck...I can't remember how it ends, but your mother's a whore.
One day I woke up and realized I'm not a baby nurse anymore. I'm not even a young nurse. I'm a real adult who has now been doing this for years, and I'm definitely expected to know what I'm doing at all times. And that's fucking terrifying.