Big Sexy

Quite a few male nurses work in our department, so much so that we rarely give it any thought. But every now and then, the gender differences are glaring.

Two weeks ago, a patient was put under conscious sedation for a procedure, and we couldn't get her to go to sleep. She kept talking, and looking around, and talking, and oogling. Finally, we had to banish the cause: the male nurse. He leaves the room, and the patient tries to sit up and go after him. We lay her flat again, and she heaves this big giant sigh, and goes, "but he's soooo sexy!"

Fast forward to tonight. My little old lady is putting up a surprisingly fierce fight against the po contrast. She doesn't want to drink it, and vehemently swears against the NG tube. While we know she is slightly demented, she knows what's going on right now and where she is, so forcing the tube would pretty much be assault. I'm trying to coax her into these little bitty sips, and she's refusing - for a half hour. Finally the same male nurse walks into the room after taking pity on me, and sweetly asks her to drink it. She eyes him up for a minute, and then grabs the cup and sucks down the entire dose of contrast. He smirks at me and walks back out.

I look at the lady and thank her for drinking it, and then ask her how Male Nurse convinced her. She looked at me like I'm an idiot, and shouts, "well, he's Big Sexy, of course."

Right. I should have guessed. Best part is, the entire nursing station overheard this exchange. So obviously, we will be calling him Big Sexy for the rest of his career...until little old ladies no longer swoon in his presence.