Friday, October 10, 2014

A Dialogue in the ER

"Alrighty, you've been discharged and we can't let you sleep here all night long. Sorry, but you've got to go," I say.

She responds, "where is the nearest bus stop?" I answer that it's about a quarter mile away, north up the street, and kindly hold the door open for her. "Can you push me there in a wheelchair so I don't have to walk?" she asks.

"Um, no."

"Fine bitch," she responds, "then I need a coffee with cream and sugar, and a sandwich bag."

***

Security is next to enter the scene.

***
"Imma mess you up, I know where you live! I'm gonna give you Ebola!" she shouts as security escorts her out on foot. The sound of her screeching fades as the doors slide shut, and I wearily sign up my name to the next patient coming into my group. Abdominal pain, the chief complaint says. And in the triage note I see their first request is for some juice.

***
End scene.




4 comments:

Aesop said...

"Plus ca change..."

Funny how they never cover this endless loop in clinical, huh?

Anonymous said...

Jeebus! She be's givin' you the Ebola! Stand back!

Seriously, I feel for you. You're awesome!

Anonymous said...
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