My Dad is great for many reasons, one being that he sends me emails like this:
All I'm sayin is...had Tiger cheated on me, I wouldn't be holding that club anymore because it would be embedded so far in his nether regions it would be invisible.
One day I woke up and realized I'm not a baby nurse anymore. I'm not even a young nurse. I'm a real adult who has now been doing this for years, and I'm definitely expected to know what I'm doing at all times. And that's fucking terrifying.