Friday, November 6, 2015

Words

"I've got so many taxis in my mouth. They all hurt. Can I get a cab ticket home since y'all giving me lortab?"

If you have access to that many taxis then surely you don't need a cab voucher.

*spoiler alert: he got a cab voucher because why the hell not.

I've always been perplexed as to why people let dental conditions get so far out of hand. While I completely understand that dental care is ridiculously expensive, basic preventative care is not. Barring poor genetics, a toothbrush and some colgate goes a long way. I went for almost six years without seeing a dentist, and because I brush twice (sometimes three times) a day I had no cavities. I also had no taxis. Plus I've known plenty of people who go decades without seeing a dentist but still take care of themselves and have no issues.

And before you get on me, internet, it's the people who freely admit that they haven't brushed their teeth in years who confuse me. I'm not talking about those who brush and just can't afford dental care or inherited shitty DNA from their folks. That's another post entirely, in which I could devote a lot of words to shaming health insurance for not including dental visits.

3 comments:

EDNurseasauras said...

Dental care would be more affordable if people did not have to purchase cigarettes.

Aesop said...

Remember, taxi vouchers aren't for getting the patient home.

They're for getting the patient dropped off too far away to walk back in and sign in again after discharge.
Ideally, so far that even a 911 call will wash them up at another hospital's teeming shores.

It's in the Relief Charge Nurse's Top Secret Reference Handbook (9th Ed. (c)2015), I tell ya.

Oh, and bonus points if you tell your drunk patients that they can't have a taxi voucher because the doctor has diagnosed them with ataxia, and they believe you.

Michelle said...

I'm a writer for Reader's Digest and would love to chat with you for a story I"m working on about hospital secrets! You can be anonymous! Please email me at michellecrouchwriter(at)gmail(dot)com and I can tell you more. (Feel free to search my name and Reader's Digest and you'll see other secrets stories I've written.) Thanks so much!